The gift of your regulation
Ripple effects of nervous system regulation
A few weeks ago I was in a session with a client. He was sharing that he was having more stress at work due to working with a new child. There were many things about the situation that felt difficult - the length of time he had to spend with the child, the fact that he did not have as much experience with young children, and the child was non-speaking and had difficulty regulating their body so their body would scream, kick, and hit during the session. My client identified that one of the stressors was the feeling of not knowing what to do. And another was that he had a hard time staying regulated while being around this client.
I can relate to this feeling, and maybe you can too. Our regulation is intertwined with other people. We play off of the energy, moods, and behaviors of the people we are around all day. Our nervous systems are constantly in dialogue with one another. Concepts like neuroception and co-regulation explain the neuroscience behind what we intuitively know.
The week that this session took place I happened to be doing an Ayurvedic kitchari cleanse. It was a week where my focus was on the nuts and bolts of my regulation. I was prioritizing preparing fresh food for myself every day, moving slowly, sitting in meditation, journaling to process what was coming up, going to sleep early and rising early. It was a week where I was much less externally focused and more internally focused.
And in that moment, I saw clearly this relationship between how we take care of ourselves and how we are able to show up for others.
I said to my client: “Your regulation is the most important thing you can offer this child.”
The words sent a shiver of knowing through me as I spoke them. Because, the words came out directed to my client, and they were also for me.
It was a moment of deep knowing, or remembering. The layers and intricacies of our nervous systems, what we can control, and how we relate to one another.
So I share this story with you because perhaps it helps you remember that your regulation is a priority. It is the priority and the key to you showing up for the people who depend on you, work with you, learn from you, and encounter you.
I find in our current landscape, nervous system regulation is becoming a buzz word that equates to specific protocols, complicated breathwork practices, a medicine cabinet full of supplements, infrared saunas… all this stuff. To buy. To do. It's easy for nervous system regulation to become another project that you have to add to your lists and perfect.
Rather than adding a ton of fancy things in, the most potent nervous system regulation comes from simplifying. Never doubt the impact of consistently doing the “simple” things, like:
Drinking enough water
Cooking & eating nourishing foods
Moving your body in a way that feels good
Getting daily sunlight
Going outside and being with nature
Laughing with others
Hugging someone (pets included)
Slowing down as you move through the mundane tasks of daily life
Making time for play
Sleeping well
Protecting your evening and morning routines
I know that all of these take time and effort. It requires us to carve out some space for ourselves in a cluttered and noisy world. It requires us to double down on creating habits that are in service of who we want to be.
And, this is all well worth your effort. It will cause a ripple effect and positively impact every human being you encounter.
As you move through the rest of your week, try on this mantra:
“My regulation is a gift. I protect it and prioritize it so that I can be of service to others.”
Upcoming Offerings
Sea & Soul Women’s Circle - Oct 10, 5-6:30pm
Calafia Beach, San Clemente, CA
Sea & Soul circles are a deep and special experience of co-regulation. Being in circle with other women, sitting with and being in conversation with the ocean, your nervous system gets to settle and receive the magic. Our theme is around fall, transition, and change and how we say “yes” to a constantly changing inner and outer landscape. 3 spaces left. Reserve your seat on Eventbrite.
1:1 OT packages
If you want to dive deeply into nervous system regulation and lifestyle transformation so you feel more grounded, present, and aligned, this offering is for you! These packages include OT sessions, ongoing email/text support, and a google drive folder with custom resources to help you reach your goals. If you are looking for support and guidance to create lasting change in your life and wellbeing, schedule a free 30-minute call and let’s connect!